I can’t possibly begin to personally thank all of the men and women who have reached out, shown their support of my InsideCatholic article, and given me a cyber pat on the back. Your emails, blog posts, phone calls, kindness, and prayers have meant a great deal to me. Thank you.
I do want to draw your attention to an InsideCatholic blog post that Steve Skojec wrote directly in response to the comments that were posted on the site beneath my original article.
As I remarked after his post, what is really upsetting to me is that some of the comments were not only anti-nursing in Mass but anti-children as well. When we baptize our children, we are opening a door to the Church and welcoming them to the Body of Christ. When people view children only as bothersome distractions at Mass, it’s as if they’re slamming that door in their face. How can we expect to build the Church if we don’t welcome the very souls who will make up its future?
Steve says it far better than I just did when he writes: ” If we are a pro-life people, we are a pro-family people, and that means we are to welcome children and their parents, breastfeeding or otherwise, especially at Mass.”
I encourage you to read the rest.
Michelle of Rosetta Stone also wrote a thought-provoking post called Humility and Acts of Mercy in response not only to the backlash from the InsideCatholic article but also to some flack I recently received after mentioning the acronym AP (as in attachment parenting) that’s well worth a read. (And, yes, I am a little biased.)
Finally, Cathy Adamkiewicz , author of Broken and Blessed, reduced me to tears when she wrote this: “Not to be maudlin, but I have to say this. You know my little girl died when she was four months old. I only got to nurse her a handful of times. If she were here, oh my goodness, I would nurse her whenever she needed me.
As I read the awful comments you received I kept thinking of a ‘rule’ I’ve developed for determining if something is a sin. If Jesus saw me doing this, would He weep?
If Jesus or His Mother saw me nursing a little one in Mass, would They weep? Maybe, with joy.”
For those of you whom I did not personally mention in this post (including those who chose to charitably disagree with me through email), thank you, thank you, thank you! You’re a beautiful reminder that God is love.
Love to you, my friend!
I applaud you for the article, and for the persistent and charitable witness you’ve shown throughout.
When we tell women on the one hand things like, “Breast is best! Nurse! Attachment parenting/bonding! Ecological BF!” etc., but then turn around and scowl “But make sure we can’t see that baby actually eating in public! Cover yourself from head to toe, go nurse in the bathroom, keep that dirty shameful activity to yourself!” we’re really sending a terribly mixed message, one that is hurtful to so many good Catholic mothers who aren’t exhibitionist at all–they just want to do what’s best for their babies.
God bless you!
When I first became Catholic (at the ripe old age of 48 (well past my breastfeeding days), I recall having a conversation with my sponsor where we talked about babies in church. I said that my babies always went to church with me and I always nursed them in church. She said she went into the confessional if her baby needed to nurse. Since then I’ve seen lots of bottles at church, but I’ve never noticed a nursing mother (and as a retired La Leche League leader, I’m pretty aware of what discreet nursing looks like. I have occasionally noticed a mom slipping into the confessional with a little one.I really have had the impression that Catholic women don’t nurse (at least not in the pew) at Mass, and it always seemed completely contrary to Catholic culture. I mean it was Catholics with all those statues of the Blessed Mother nursing her baby. It was Catholic women who STARTED La Leche League in the first place.
I am amazed that people have no problem with teenaged girls wearing backless dresses or low cut tops, mini skirts, 12 inches or more above the knees, etc. and yet think that a mom discreetly nursing her baby is somehow a distraction. It seems like just another example of the warped nature of sexuality in our culture that we can’t accept the fact that the primary purpose of breasts is to feed babies. Yes they are attractive to men as well, but their primary purpose is for nurture not passion.
I try at every opportunity to encourage parents with little people at church, even if the little people are having a hard day. One day there was a mom with three little people. The kids were having a really tough time. After Mass I noticed that one of them had left their stuffed animal behind in the pew. The mom had taken them up to the Lady altar, so I retrieved the toy and took it to them. I encouraged her to keep bringing them, that there behavior would improve. She was so grateful that someone was willing to say something kind to her because she knew the kids had been a real distraction.
We make promises at every baptism to support parents as they raise the babies that are being baptized. Part of that support is to encourage them as they attempt to train their kids to sit through Mass, and to welcome their children from the tiniest nursing baby on upwards.
Honestly, I always thought it was the Protestants that were Puritanical and Victorian about such things. I was amazed to find how many Puritanical Catholics there were.