I recently had plans to go to weekday Mass. My good intentions were nearly thwarted.
First, the natives were restless and I woke up not once, not even twice, but three times in the night.
At the break of dawn, I had to drag my exhausted, bedraggled zombie of a self out of bed. A cup of coffee and a few rushed prayers later, I felt almost human. The kids and I were ready to go, but just as I was buckling my toddler into her car seat, I caught a whiff of something toxic. I checked her diaper and sure enough, she had a blowout that was now leaking onto her outfit. Lovely. So the three of us rushed inside for a quick diaper and wardrobe change for the baby.
Onward Christian soldiers!
Back into the minivan and off to church! We merged onto the highway into a sea of cars and I thought, “God, if you really want me to go to Mass today, why are you making it so difficult?”
There was no reply, just constant bumper-to-bumper traffic all the way to my exit.
We finally made it into church and there in the presence of Christ, I thought of something I hadn’t before. It certainly wasn’t God blocking me from the Eucharist, making it difficult for me to get where I needed to be. He wasn’t the one encouraging me to stay home and snooze while I popped in a DVD for the kiddies or to turn around so I wouldn’t have to endure one more minute of heinous traffic.
But it was someone just as real but a whole lot harder for me to acknowledge. Maybe, just maybe, it was Satan whispering in my ear, telling me it was okay to not go to Mass, telling me I deserved a break and that God would understand, keeping me from the peace I so desperately craved, preventing me from giving thanks to Christ.
Nobody talks about the devil much anymore. Honestly, most days I don’t give much thought to his presence, and I definitely embraced God’s existence long before I accepted Satan. Why talk about a somewhat abstract source of fear, temptation, damnation, and evil when we can focus on the real mercy and love of Christ?
Interestingly, belief in the devil is a sign of spiritual maturity, according to many theologians, including Pope Benedict XVI.
I guess that makes me a teenager in terms of my divine development.
You can read the rest of my latest Catholic Mom column here.
Thanks for the reminder, no one likes to think about the devil that is for sure!
Over the last couple of years I have been thinking more and more about the devil and his temptaions. As of late, I have been trying to determine which temptations are from him or my own fleshy desires. But you are right nobody talks about the evil one and I think it is about time that the appropriate people start emphasizing his role in the world and ways in which we can combat him.
I read your column, and found it an interesting juxtaposition with this from another GA mom:
http://www.testosterhome.net/2006/08/view-from-pew.html
I think it’s very important to consider the season in which you find yourself as a Christian and parent when pondering these questions. You’ve given me a particular sign post for my own season today, some very good food for thought.
Nicole, thank you so much for sharing this! I always enjoy Rachel Balducci’s writing (and in fact, I used to live in her hometown!). This is something I needed to hear – that it’s okay that I don’t make it to Mass as much as I used to given my station in life (AKA the mom of two little ones with another on the way). I know so many other young moms who make it to weekly Mass far more often than I do, and this has been leaving me feeling guilty.
I do have to be careful not to over-rationalize and allow minor inconveniences keep me from going to weekly Mass. But last week, for example, I planned on going on Fri. Well, my youngest decided to sleep in late that morning, and I wasn’t going to wake her.
As Rachel mentions, our vocation, our primary apostolate right now is to be moms (and wives). We may not have time for lengthy contemplative prayer sessions or we may not be able to make it to daily Mass, but we can offer all we do with love and pay attention to divine nudges throughout the day to praise God and to ask Him as well as His Mother for their help.
I’ve been wanting to write a post on a mother’s prayer life. Stay tuned…
God bless, and thanks again for the link.
I agree! I think I’ve watched The Usual Suspect too many times, but the character delivers a quote (from a French philosopher) at the end. He says, “the greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world that he didn’t exist.”