As part of the Virtual National Catholic Women’s Conference, I was invited to host a Live Q&A to discuss anxiety, depression, and body image. I could have definitely hosted an hour (or two!) on each of those topics individually. When I was wrapping up the session, I ended up hijacking the last part of the talk with my anti-diet rhetoric. I apologize. There were a lot of women tuned in who probably weren’t there to hear an anti-diet message. Some may have even been confused because aren’t we called to care for these temples of the Holy Spirit and not allow food to control us? My response to this question has drastically changed over the years. Now that I recognize how much time women waste on finding the new diet or healthy lifestyly change that will finally give them to body, health, and/or happiness they desire, I’m extremely reluctant to endorse any form of weight loss. Instead, I encourage women to pursue weight-neutral goals and changes and to also look into the science-based concept of health at any size (known as HAES).
When I speak about making peace with your body, reclaiming the beauty of Creation, glorifying God with your body, recognizing your worth transcends the number on the scale, embracing your God-given, made in His image desisgn, I get cheers and head nods. Amen, Sister! Yet when I start to question a woman’s diet program or “healthy” weight loss, things can get a little murky and sometimes even a tad tense. I get it. I have nothing but empathy for anyone out there who celebrating how his/her low-carb program has helped him/her shed the weight or any person whose doctor is congratulating him/her for reclaiming her health. But none of this is the answer to peace. That’s what this recent conference focused on: PEACE. Peace doesn’t come with diets, weight loss, or doctors patting you on the back for taking charge of your health. Peace comes when you don’t even stop to consider how much or how little you eat, when you savor a delicious “treat” as much as you might savor a kale and quinoa salad. I knew I was closer to achieving food freedom a few years ago when I realized I could choose to eat a low-fat pile of vegetables or a cheese-laden, greasy piece of pizza without much consideration and certainly no guilt or complicated thought process.
Listen, I know there are many women who have successfully lost weight with reset plans or eliminating certain food groups, etc., but I will never be an advocate for any form of dieting/healthy lifestyle plan, etc. Your body is so wise. It doesn’t need a reset or a cleanse or a detox (your liver and kidneys are detox masters). If you’ve gained some weight during quaratine, so what? We just freaking lived through a pandemic. Your body will eventually reset and figure things out. Even if you keep some softness, who cares? Your weight is the least interesting thing about you. Why would you ever measure your success or your worth in inches or pounds lost?
The irony is the last 15 minutes of this Q&A ended up revolving around a woman’s weight loss success story and then me responding with my cautionary tale against diets or any form of weight loss. Here we were: Two women, no doubt from different walks of life, who could have been sharing our faith or talking about how to minister to others suffering from mental health, and all we could talk about was weight and chocolate (I eat it whenever I feel like it; she doesn’t but she said she still enjoys little bits now and then). This lengthy digression about food and diets just proved my point. As women, we have so much more to talk about and so much work to be done in the vineyard of the Lord. Let’s not waste it on arguing about the “virtues” of the latest diet or weight loss success story.
Diet culture is so insidious. The weight loss and health industry bank (literally) on people wanting to lose weight or tone up or feel at their best. The industry also hinges upon you failing because if we all could achieve perfect physical bliss and FINALLY feel completely at home and comfortable in our bodies for the rest of our lives, then we’d never need a new plan or another reset. The industry would become obsolete and would stop making money. It preys upon you not feeling thin/strong/healthy/good enough. It depends upon you constantly seeking change and being convinced that any icky feeling or digestion issue isn’t caused by anxiety around food or your weight but by the food and your weight itself.
Another beautiful woman asked me if I’d heard of some reset program. She even held up the book that outlined the plan. I told her I stay away from any such program. I said this was because of my eating disordered history, and it is to a certain extent. But I’d encourage anyone to stay away from a “reset.” None of us needs a drastic reset that tells us what or what not to eat. Maybe the best reset would be getting to bed at a reasonable hour, praying more, seeking help for subterranean feelings of anxiety and/or depression, being more creative, connecting more with loved ones, moving your body in a way you love and for the joy of it, and drinking enough water each day. Why do we pigeon-hole health into only what we eat and our BMI?
Someone once told me how well she slept once she started one of those reset programs like Whole 30. She said she collapsed into bed each night and fell into a deep sleep. I wondered if part of her zombie-like sleep stemmed from the fact that she was no longer eating enough and was depleted and exhausted from a lack of proper caloric intake.
One of my kids asked if it would be healthy to only eat cookies every day, day afer day. “No, that wouldn’t be healthy, but neither would only eating kale.” We have to stop demonizing some foods while elevating others to an almost virtuous and holy level.
Again, I am not trying to demonize anyone who is lured into following some plan or doctor who’s been on Dr. Oz and promises to have the secret to weight loss success. It’s so hard. I’ve been lured in even though I work hard to stay away from triggers and have worked with an anti-diet nutrition (which I highly recommend). I get it. I really do.
One of the conference participants pointed out that it didin’t look like I had a “weight problem.” I too quickly quipped, “I don’t!” because pridefully I wanted to “prove” you don’t have to eliminate entire food groups from your eating to be at a so-called weight. But the truth is you can’t tell if someone has a weight problem simply by looking her and gauging her weight. A “weight” problem is anyone who spends an inordinate amount of time tracking calories, macros, calories burned, or celebrates weight loss as a significant humanitarian accomplishment and weight gain as an indictment against a person’s character. A weight problem is someone who thinks they are morally superior because they have the “will power” to get ripped or to lose weight. A weight problem is someone who defines health only in terms of the physical instead of recognizing it may not be “healthy” to avoid social gatherings where high-calorie foods might be served because they don’t fit into your meal plan. A weight problem might be someone who only feels at peace when they are eating “right.” Someone might have a weight problem if they use Lenten fasting as a way to prep for swimsuit season. Fasting without a conversation with God and any inkling of a spiritual conversion is just another diet.
I don’t want anyone to have a weight problem. Life is hard enough without pouring your heart and soul into changing your body or investing a lifetime in hating it.
I once was what would be considered overweight. I was bullied. I cried myself to sleep wishing the beautiful me wasn’t trapped beneath so many layers of skin. Then I got thin. Like so many of us, I thought thin meant better. I also thought being thin and controlling my weight might protect me from ever being hurt again. Spoiler alert: It didn’t.
Fat phobia is real. Diet culture is insidious. Whatever the current diet du jour, it’s incredibly tempting to embrace it because it appears that it will offer us so much, and the alternative is frightening. Diets always promote something that is seemingly better than what you’re doing now (or feeling now) while offering you a sense of belonging, safety, happiness, and success. These are longings of the human heart, but we need to find a better way of satisfying these desires rather than through restricting or obsessing over what we put into our mouth. Diets make people smaller. Sometimes literally, but always figuratively. They shrink wrap you into a less dimensional and full person. They zap so much energy from you and divert it to such a small part of life. So I’m never going to champion “better” equating to thinner or weighing less. I’m never going to congratulate a woman on her weight loss or her before and after. I will always take the longview when it comes to eating and food. Diets may work for the short-term (research shows 80 percent of people gain the weight and often a few extra pounds back 2-3 years after a “successful” diet), and they “work” for a few years because they lead others to praise and celebrate the person who lost the weight. That affirmation feels fleetingly good. But it doesn’t bring the kind of lasting peace I desire.
Diet culture is a lot like a pseudo religion. Losing weight or pursuing health/”clean” eating gives you purpose. It can also offer community and rules while promoting what feels like a virtuous morality (less carbs, no processed junk). It promises of safety, happiness, and less suffering. Yet, when you still suffer or you stop losing weight or gain a few pounds back, you feel like maybe something is wrong with you and it’s time to up the ante, to become more “religious.” Meanwhile, life is passing you by; Jesus is whispering: My peace I give you. You won’t find peace in a slice of cake, but you won’t find it in a diet and weight loss either.
Loving and making peace with your body isn’t about loving how your body looks (or how you perceive it to look); it’s about loving your body because it is. I invite you to never allow another diet or eating plan to distract you from your innate dignity and being. You are perfectly lovely just the way you are, and you have so much more to offer the world than your skin. God created you as you are. Stop questioning His taste.
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For anyone interested, I read Intuitive Eating: A Revolutionary Anti-Diet Approach a few years ago, and it changed my life. It made me see just how dangerous dieting is and how my body truly is amazing and worthy of trust and respect.
Hi Kate, I appreciate your perspective on this. I did want to run some things by you. I know that a while back I commented on another one of your posts on this topic, and I mentioned that I had participated in a Catholic weightloss program called Lightweigh. It’s a program that combines spiritual practices with practical steps to promote weight loss, better health and peace with food. There is a component of intuitive eating involved, but it is achieved differently than what you’re describing. The program was definitely life changing for me. As a child and teenager I struggled with borderline anorexia and bulimia. As an adult, I was thin in my 20s and then steadily started gaining weight. This was a huge blow to my self esteem. Through Lightweigh, I lost 40 pounds and have kept it off for 3 years. You’re absolutely right that it didn’t magically solve all my problems. It didn’t make me look 10 years younger and it didn’t make me 10 times happier than I had been when I was 40 pounds overweight. It didn’t even make me skinny; I currently weigh 121 pounds which is not tiny for a woman my height (5’2 with small bones). But it did improve my self confidence and self esteem, and I am definitely healthier now. (I know that it’s possible to be healthy and overweight, but that is not the case for everyone, and it was not the case for me.) That being said, I still struggle with emotional eating, so I certainly haven’t achieved peace with food. But I feel that I eat in a more ordered way, without gluttony, no food is off limits or labeled bad, and I am satisfied with smaller portions. For me, this represents spiritual growth (appreciating smaller portions rather than always striving for more is a form of increasing my gratitude to God).
Though I stopped participating in the Lightweigh programs almost 3 years ago, I still get their emails at least once/week. At this point, while acknowledging how helpful the program was for me, I can no longer in good conscience recommend it. The owner of the program, in her emails, has made comments that imply support for things like Qanon, which I find highly offensive. I don’t really need the program right now anyway, but because I still struggle with emotional eating, I’m always on the lookout for programs that could help with that. I have found a Christian (not Catholic) program called Faithful Finish Lines that promotes similar principles (inviting God into struggles with body image and emotional eating, good stewardship of food intake as opposed to gluttony, no food is off-limits or labeled as bad, etc).
I’m sorry this comment is so long, and I don’t really know what my question is exactly, or if I even have one. I’m just interested in your feedback. You make a lot of great points, but I do think there are some weightloss programs that make sense for some people, like me. If I took a purely intuitive eating approach, I know exactly what would happen. I would start out like an unrestrained kid in a candy store and eat everything in sight. Eventually I might level off and develop a better relationship with food, but that could take quite a while, and in the meantime I would gain a to of weight. That would be devastating for my self esteem and self confidence, and right now I’m hanging on by a thread raising my only child with special needs. If I add the stress that I know this approach would cause, it could filter down to him, and that’s not a risk I can take. I guess what I’m saying is that your way is probably ideal, but there are people like me for whom other approaches are going to be more realistic. Again, I would love to hear your thoughts and feedback.
Hi, Claire. I so appreciate your thoughts and your continued support of my ministry (and this poor, neglected blog). I remember and cherish all of your reflections and comments. Thank you for sharing your heart with me.
Now, before I share any of my personal thoughts, I want to stress that we are all on our own journey. I once was very much an advocate of pursuing wellness and even weight loss as a form of self-love as well as an expression of our love for God and our gratitude for our amazing bodies. I even wrote in Weightless about how we shouldn’t look for comfort in ice cream; now I’d say it’s okay to find some solace in Ben & Jerry’s. Not peace – that comes from Christ – but comfort? Pleasure? Sure. If you’ve had a bad day or a bad year, eat a candy bar. It’s certainly not the worst thing a person can do. (Below, I explain further about emotional eating and why we become more prone to it in the first place…Spoiler alert: A history of dieting!). At any rate, as I’ve grown in wisdom, learned more about my own body and intuitive eating, and how powerful and damaging diet culture is, my views have shifted.
I remember you sharing your previously positive experience with Light Weigh. Even at the time (when I wasn’t so convinced that any weight loss program ultimately does more harm than good), I knew it wouldn’t be right for me given my eating disordered past. Any form of deprivation or focus on losing weight (even the name of the program) can be triggering for me. Yet, now I’d voice even a stronger warning against the program (of course, to be fair I don’t know much about it, so I’d have to look into it further to really address my particular concerns) for ANY person regardless of the eating history. I’m grateful you’ve stepped away from it (and haven’t fallen prey to conspiracy theories as well! Wow! This has been an eye-opening year for me as I’ve witnessed many faithful Catholics becoming impervious to rational thoughts and joining myriad conspiracy theory bandwagons!) because I truly believe any program or even individual who frames weight loss as a side benefit to growing closer to God and/or making peace with food is implying that weight gain and higher weights are to be feared and avoided at all costs thus hindering recovery from rampant disordered eating among Americans as well as fueling diet culture. I don’t know anything about the Faithful Finish Lines program either…but I did just Google it and briefly peruse the landing page. Even the first pithy phrase I saw: “Grow your faith, lose the weight” assigns a moral value to a person’s weight. I will never endorse that.
I hired an anti-diet dietician awhile back, and it was so eye-opening to me because she helped me to see that diet culture is sneaky but ubiquitous and what it really aims to do is to promote weight loss and thinness (or being more toned) as a means of attaining a higher social status, feeling safer, finding a sense of belonging, and/or claiming moral virtue. Example: If you are fat and/or emotionally eat, then you are morally inferior to someone who is thin and/or fit and doesn’t ever eat because she’s sad. That kind of thinking is dangerous. As Catholics, we are taught how important the virtues of temperance and prudence are. I still believe they’re important, but I see far more Catholics struggling with the virtue of temperance in terms of how often they think about or pursue weight loss or wellness. I’ve also witnessed a lack of charity in pro-life circles during the pandemic. I saw so-called pro-life Christians eschewing masks because older and/or obese people were the ones at risk. They were – whether consciously or not – assigning value to human beings. This kind of rhetoric was so sad and disappointing to me. Even a loved one whom I respect made a comment after someone they knew died of Covid about how he’d had a good run and he did have a heart condition – as if that meant his life was less valuable than a younger, healthier person. Diet culture similarly can attack the dignity of a person. People are worthy and have dignity regardless of how healthy they are, what they can or cannot do, or how much they weigh.
But back to my experience with the IE RD: She helped me to see that self-care is about eating what your body needs and sometimes even wants more than following any rules or portion restrictions. I kept asking her about wellness and how I wanted that, but she said wellness without the obsession is very hard because nowadays even most companies, plans, individuals, etc. who promote wellness are really selling fake forms of self-care, because they’re all about following external rules and trends (which aren’t even evidence-based), all geared toward meeting an oppressive standard of “health” that’s overwhelmingly white, thin, young, able-bodied, wealthy, and inaccessible to most people. (I do think I’ll work on a future post about how to pursue health without any form of dieting or any endorsement of diet culture; it’s difficult but possible!)
True self-care is about breaking free from diet culture in all its forms, so that you can tune into your own body’s wisdom. God created our bodies – and they are amazing, miraculous, really!
As you know I’m now a huge advocate of intuitive eating. But two caveats: First off, it’s terrifying when you first begin. The first few months of really trying to embrace this new way of eating and living, I did eat way too much – or at least I still was placing judgment on around how much I *should* be eating. I also have gained some weight over the past five years since being introduced to IE. I don’t weigh myself, but some of my “skinny” clothes are too tight now. Yet, I ran a marathon. I have energy. I am okay in this larger-than-before body. Also, once I let go of the fear and judgment and gave myself permission, things settled down and I found myself thinking less and less about food. One particularly amazing moment is when I bought myself a Reese’s FastBreak at the store – something I never would have done before I discovered intuitive eating. I stashed it in my purse for later and then I FORGOT about it. In previous years, if I had junk around, it would serenade me constantly until I either threw it away or shoved it in my mouth and swallowed it without even tasting and then later sat with a big lump of guilt and regret. But suddenly, even a Reese’s had no power over me! When I did finally eat it, I enjoyed it and then moved on with my life!
Now sometimes I’ll find myself feeling out of control around food again, but that’s when I realize that I’ve once again been listening to the food police or perhaps I’ve been triggered by something I saw on social media or a casual remark someone made about the awesome, new cleanse they are trying. So my out of control eating is actually rooted in a form of unhealthy restriction even if I’m not actually restricting. Does that make sense?
#2 caveat: Even intuitive eating can be masquerading as another diet. Intuitive eating can twist you into following your hunger and fullness cues in order to manipulate your body size. Or it may promote you pay inordinate attention to physical symptoms in order to determine what foods to eliminate. But none of that is intuitive eating. At its heart, IE is about getting your needs met. What does it mean to have your needs met? It means eating enough food in general and incorporating enough excitement and variety into your meals to keep you from feeling disappointed, bored, and/or deprived (deprivation, not weak will power, is what ultimately fuels gluttony). IE includes eating nourishing foods but also fun foods that simply bring you pleasure. It includes recognizing that health includes not just our physical selves but how we are doing emotionally and spiritually. Again, maybe we are avoiding gluttony so to speak; yet, we are also spending nearly every waking our meal planning and thinking about food when we could be doing so much more with our limited mental real estate as well as our souls!
God wants us to take care of ourselves and in our culture which is so terribly entrenched in fat phobia and diet culture, I feel we ought to worry less about gluttony and indulging too much and be more concerned about true self-care – valuing our bodies enough to NOT partake in restriction or deprivation that masquerades as self-care.
Also, about emotional eating: I think we all just must do our best so we can meet our needs in whatever circumstances we find ourselves thrown into and then not beat ourselves up for not eating perfectly. Like I mentioned above, I no longer weigh myself, but I’m pretty sure I’ve put on a few more pounds since the pandemic. It’s not easy and sometimes I still want to beat myself up or fast for a week to just get back to where I was, but then I remind myself this was a hard year. I’m in 40s now. My body is changing, and yeah, I probably did eat a little more than I physically needed at times because I was quarantined for months. One of my children LOVES to eat and also gained weight in boredom. Honestly, my husband and I haven’t always handled the child’s weight gain well. I have noticed that if we police the child’s intake, he/she eats more. If he/she feels shame or the threat of restriction, he can’t control himself around food. Lately, I’ve tried to take the long approach. This has been a hard year. He/she ate more. He/she loves food (a gift from God). He/she has a lot of growing left to do. He/she will be more willing and able to make healthy choices if our home doesn’t become a microcosm of diet culture. Oh, but it’s been so hard!!!
I keep reminding myself that perhaps my child and I emotionally needed the pleasure of dish of ice cream during this anxiety-ridded time. So I’ve given myself as well as my child grace. In your case, perhaps unwittingly you are still using will power to hold yourself back from eating enough or certain types of foods in your normal, everyday life, and this is what is making you more likely “crack” and turn to food when difficult feelings arise. Like so many people, you seem to be blaming yourself for the emotional eating instead of the food rules you’ve imposed on yourself.
My IE RD also helped me to see that judging emotional eating as wrong or a sign of our weakness or if our emotional eating causes us to eat things or amounts we don’t think we’re supposed to eat because of our past diets, then it just causes us to emotional eat more. Of course we’re going to eat more when we are stressed if we are so rigid and “good” when life isn’t so tumultuous. We can “keep it together” (ie, eat the way we think are supposed to eat) when life is all hunky dory, but it’s no wonder we sometimes “fall of the wagon” when we’re faced with challenges or when life gets tough. We are only human. Emotional eating can also turn into a binge when we our feelings are out of control and when we then have judgment around turning to food to help with those feelings. Why eat just a spoonful of ice cream when I can polish off the pint because I’m bored or numb or anxious? Why not eat everything yummy in the kitchen because I’ve already screwed up royally? Might as well start being “better” tomorrow. We are emotionally eating and binging not because of our lack of control but because of the diet mentality and judgment surrounding the behaviour and what we eat on a “normal” day. So once again, diet culture is to blame!
This is why permission to eat all food and allowance of emotional eating behaviors is critical to long-term binge eating recovery.
I also paused at your comment about having more self-esteem now. I hesitate to share this, but I want you to pray about this and ponder this: Do you have more self-esteem now because you truly feel better about your life and whom you are as a person (not how you look as a person) – or do you feel better about your life having finally “succeeded” at weight loss and because you now occupy a smaller body? I struggled as a child with being overweight and getting teased; my self-esteem was not great. But I know now that I was the same creative, caring person as a child as I was a teenager who became too thin and didn’t have a period for three years. God loved me just as much then as He did when I was too thin and as he does now. My worth must come from Him and my love for whom I am regardless of external pressures (or external bullying!) to be something else or to look a different way. While my self-esteem did approve once I occupied a thinner body (and especially once I overcame my eating disorder and reached a reasonable weight for me), the reason wasn’t because I was better. The essence of me had not changed. I felt (briefly) happier and satisfied with myself because culture has taught me that thinner is better. Being more in control of your food is better. Achieving weight loss is better. So once again diet culture and fat phobia might be dictating what a person defines as “success” and therefore it’s the system of beliefs that improves or harms a person’s self-esteem more than what a person actually weighs or how she looks. I hated my body and myself because boys called me a “fat leper” and “Miss Piggy” and because some people shamed me when I reached for a cookie and that shame stayed with me whenever I reached for anything I deemed as “bad” because someone or culture had taught me that – not actually because of how much I weighed. It was the thoughts around how much I weighed that impacted my self-esteem.
I don’t want to undermine your hard work or your feelings, Claire. You are a beautiful soul made in God’s image, and you have to find what truly brings you peace. But you and every single person deserves to have our needs met – no matter our size, shape, ability, age, skin color, gender, or anything else. The cultural megaphone will continue to shout out that if whatever lifestyle change you’ve embraced hasn’t really worked or has stopped working, then there’s a “right” one just around the corner. Yet, for the vast majority of people there is no one right way to care for yourself, and no diet or wellness plan will make you lose weight and keep it offer for more than a handful of years. People will always tell me, but I’ve kept the weight off for 2 years. Come back to me in 5, and tell me where you’re at. Now there is a small portion of people who do seem to be able to “keep the weight off,” but I wonder at what cost? I know someone who has kept the weight off, but she also avoids any social gathering where “bad” food might be served. She allows herself to eat a small piece of cake one day a year – on her bday. I don’t know, but that’s just sad to me. Life is meant to be celebrated. People are designed to break bread – yes BREAD!!! – together. I know I could occupy a thinner body if I set those kind of rules or if I exercised like it’s my job (like fitness influencers do who are selling us their “get toned” programs). But have any of these people truly found food freedom, or is there still chaos circling their relationship with food? Are they living full lives or are they too afraid of a full stomach to do that? Are they happy and at-peace because they’ve stayed at their goal weight or is their peace, as it should be, rooted in the truth that they have worth and are God’s beloved no matter how much they weigh or how they look in photographs?
Even in terms of health, there’s no diet that will make you live forever. Certainly, there are people with diagnosed medical conditions like celiac disease who avoid certain foods because it’s life-saving, but there are far more people who restrict unnecessarily and it’s causing more harm than good to their overall well-being. (Ironically, anxiety around food and disordered eating can actually cause the same digestive issues many people blame on eating “bad” food.)
My friend, I’ve gone off on another rant, and I’m so sorry. I’m obviously passionate about this, but I also recognize that part of the reason is because I crave full freedom from body image angst and food so much, and I’m not quite there yet and admittedly, anyone talking about how much better they feel about losing weight or sharing what seems on the surface like a virtuous diet/wellness plan makes me question my own hard work to break free from it all. Perhaps I’m not right after all? So then I have to clamber onto my soapbox partly to convince myself that this is the right belief system and journey for me. :-)
I want to give you grace and my prayers to choose your own path. However, I also want to give you permission to stop chasing the Holy Grail of Wellness and Thinness. You don’t have to continue on this quest any longer. There’s so much life unfolding right here, right now. You don’t have to waste another second worrying about your “emotional eating,” wishing away pounds, wondering if the program you followed before or the new one you just discovered is “right” for you. What’s right and good is thanking God for your body and then moving along, regardless of its shape, and freeing your mind and spirit to embrace the things that really matter in life.
You were fearfully and wonderfully made in the image of God. Don’t let diet culture or anything or anyone tell you any differently or make you see your body as anything less than worthy simply because of its being. You are not a human body. You are not a human doing either. You are a human being.
I hope my tome helped or at least gave you some food for thought (pun intended.). God bless!
Kate, thank you so much for your thoughtful reply. I especially appreciate it because I know you’re a busy mother of 5 and I am humbled that you invested the time to respond to my questions. You make a lot of good points. I honestly feel that I eat whatever I want now and definitely celebrate special occasions, etc and don’t feel deprived. I do feel that your approach is probably the ideal, but just not one that would work for me right now (I know myself too well!). As far as my improved self esteem, I guess it’s because I feel like I accomplished something, not that I think being thinner makes me a superior person. In raising a child with special needs, I never really know whether anything I’m doing is making a difference. Maybe someday I will, but right now the jury is still out. So accomplishing something like losing 40 pounds and finding a way to feel thankful and satisfied with more reasonable portion sizes feels like an accomplishment to me, and helps with my self esteem. My increased self confidence, I will admit, is more based on the fact that I feel more comfortable in my own skin. Anyway, I also wanted to let you know that I completely share your experience regarding the response that some pro-life Catholics have had to the pandemic. I have found it extremely disheartening. I’m glad to see that you don’t fall into that camp! Many blessings.
Oh, one more thing, just wondering if I’m alone here…given my history with borderline anorexia, bulimia, and emotional eating, I really struggle with the fasting required on Ash Wednesday and Good Friday. Even though it’s not a very strict fast, it still feels triggering to me. I do it, and I don’t come out the other side feeling traumatized, but I always dread it.
Claire, I actually did write (a long time ago!) about this very topic: https://katewicker.com/2014/04/why-fasting-on-food-all-throughout-lent-isnt-the-best-path-to-holiness-for-me/
I struggle with it as well. You are not alone!
Also, these two articles are insightful and related to this conversation:
https://www.americamagazine.org/faith/2018/02/07/fasting-fat-shaming-and-finding-christ-my-body
https://www.americamagazine.org/faith/2021/01/01/covid-19-diet-new-year-weight-loss-love-neighbor-resolutions-239604
Thank YOU, Claire, for sharing your heart and perspective. Your “invisible” work with your special needs child IS making a difference! God bless you.
Thank you Kate. I will check out those links. Have a blessed Easter!
KATE! YESSSS! I have been talking about this a lot lately and was about to blog my own rant! :)
Thank you so much for your support, Emily. I would love to read your take on this topic, especially given your experience with “living on the precipice of death.” I would imagine your life with cystic fibrosis and having received a double lung transplant offfers you a unique perspective on what really matters in life (and in death). Please do share the link if you decide to write something! God bless you and your ministry!