I once had a friend lament over how she hasn’t signed her 6-month-old up for any baby “classes” yet.
“Are you wanting to get out more?” I asked her.
“No. I’m fine, but she seems bored. I think she needs more stimulation.”
My friend is a product of modern parenting and the school of thought that it’s never too early to start thinking about getting your kid into Harvard.
I’m not suggesting extracurricular activities are bad for little ones, but they’re certainly not necessary. Sure, if you have the time and money, sign your tot up for kid’s gymnastics, music classes or art lessons, but don’t feel like a bad mom if you don’t. I’m no child psychologist, but I think children learn best when they’re given the chance to be kids and to play in an unstructured environment.
When people discover I’m homeschooling, they often ask me all about my “curriculum” for Madeline. Mind you, she’s not even 4 yet. Truth is, we have no real curriculum (although I do sometimes pull ideas from a Catholic preschool program called Little Saints). We don’t do any formal schooling, but we read lots of books together, do an occasional craft, sing, doodle, and go on walks.
“But do you do preschool in your home?”
Every day is “school” in our home. When we bake together, I let Madeline measure out the flour or count the number of eggs we need. When we go on a walk and notice a butterfly, we talk about our favorite insects. When we’re reading together, she asks, “Why?” roughly three times per minute and I’m always explaining and teaching.
Still, the Type-Aer in me and the mom who wants to be as good as the next mom whose toddler is enrolled in Spanish, piano, and creative movement classes is constantly wondering, “Am I really doing enough?”
Of course, my mommy gut (which I’ve found to be far more accurate than any expert’s opinion when it comes to my own children) tells me I’m doing exactly what I should be doing. I’m letting my 3-year-old be who she is – an imaginative child who’s curious about her world, who loves to play with her menagerie of animal figures, draw, and whose best classroom is life.
I’m so glad to hear that others teach their children like this, too. Every day is a lesson for a child, even in the car there’s time to talk, ask and answer questions, and learn. Go for it!
I too occasionally get someone asking about preschool for one of the kids, and there was a time when I fretted about it. My oldest did 2 years of preschool, and I wondered if I weren’t depriving the others the same “opportunities.” That was when I lived in the Northeast and EVERYBODY got their children “involved” in activities from their infancy.
Once I moved from that area, I realized that the rest of the country isn’t quite as obsessed with this sort of thing. Among military families (many of whom are from the South), at least half don’t send their children to preschool (from those who stay-at-home, I mean), and rarely do I hear someone discussing “mommy and me” classes for infants and toddlers.
Now, when someone asks about preschool, I look at them like they have horns on their head. And then I want to ask if their child’s preschool includes story-time using biographies of famous Americans, or if they have math manipulatives for fractions, or if they are learning Latin alongside their 4th grade sibling.